“Ever felt that people are a bit quick to judge? That’s because we are. Research shows we make up our minds about someone in a matter of seconds – and what’s more, we’re surprisingly good at it.” (The Guardian)
Growing up, my Dad taught me that in order to make a really good impression you have to show confidence. Yet so many people struggle with confidence and conveying confidence to others. So, how can someone go from little confidence to having a truck load of it?
There’s a science behind first impressions. As humans we make a decision about others within seconds of meeting them. (Forbes)
It can take years to change an initial impression about someone. So, besides being proud and confident of yourself it is also important to work on your non verbal cues.
Here are five simple ways to get started:
Avoid crossing your arms.
When you cross your arms you are showing others that you are hiding yourself and that you aren’t confident. It’s like saying “Hey! I don’t feel secure about myself so I have to shield myself from you”. Whenever I would cross my arms my Dad would always ask me “Are you cold?” It was kind of his way of reminding me that crossing my arms didn’t make me look confident. Even ‘til this day if I even think about crossing my arms my Dad’s words pop into my head.
Make eye contact.
Keeping eye contact with someone is hard. Like really hard. But if you can pull it off it is one of the best ways to display confidence. This tip is also pretty easy to start doing. The next time you talk to someone, look them in the eyes. You’ll notice they will start to look around and shift focus elsewhere. This translates into a more dominate role in the conversation. This is also helpful when negotiating.
Never hold a glass in your dominant hand.
This is more of a life hack than a step to becoming more confident. Have you ever gone to an event and shook someone’s hand, only to have your hand get soggy and disgusting? It’s unprofessional and doesn’t show confidence at all. So, every time you hold something cold (and maybe wet in your hand), hold it in your less dominant hand. This leaves your other hand open to greet others confidently. Actually, just don’t hold anything in your less dominant hand if the potential for a handshake is there. This way you aren’t fumbling trying to get whatever you are holding into your other hand.
Pay attention to your look.
This is a broad topic, but pivotal to looking confident. Make sure your clothes fit and that your hair looks nice. Not only will it boost your self-esteem, but it will also be noticeable to those around you. Simply put – don’t look like a bum – even if it is industry appropriate.
Practice a firm handshake.
This is the most important tip to appearing confident. Don’t offer a wimpy or slack handshake. It screams that you aren’t confident in yourself. When I was a kid my Dad’s boss sat me down and taught me how to offer a proper, firm and confident handshake. Honestly, that lesson has helped me in many situations later in my life and I have received hundreds of comments on it. So, if you are going to take one tip from this list, take this one.
Looking and feeling confident starts with you and how you feel about yourself. If you don’t love yourself why would anyone else? These tips will help you get there.
This article has been edited and condensed.
Love my family, but business is my game. Always hustling and I love exotic cars. Oh! And you should follow me on Instagram too @MikeTandy.
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