Embrace Fear, Listen To It, And Make It Work For You

Irrational fears keep us from moving forward in our business and life.

Photo: Shelley Davidescu; Credit:
Caroline White
Photo: Shelley Davidescu; Credit:
Caroline White

There’s so much talk about “being fearless” these days.

Many people suggest that you eradicate fear or eliminate it like you would a virus or the plague.

I get it. Fear is an emotion that can put a serious damper on your entrepreneurial ventures when used incorrectly.

Instead, I challenge you to grab your tea, coffee or a glass of wine and get cozy with it.


Consider why fear even exists

Like every emotion, fear has its unique purpose. Fear keeps us safe from physical and emotional harm (real or perceived). There are rational fears that help keep us safe and irrational fears that are a pain in the rear.

Irrational fears keep us from moving forward in our business and life.


Get ready to embrace your fear

If you’re an entrepreneur several things are going to happen.


  • You’re going to make mistakes. Lots of them. Learn from them, dust yourself off and keep going.

  • You’re not always going to have a successful product or service launch. So what! Instead, regroup and do it again.

  • You’re going to learn some hard and expensive lessons. P.S. I still haven’t met an entrepreneur who hasn’t, including myself. So, have a plan on how to bounce back.

  • You’re going to want to quit, sometimes more than once. Hide that quit button if you’re truly going after your passion.

  • You’re going to have to pivot or switch directions. Be gentle on yourself, it’s okay to change your mind more than once.


Ask yourself this: “real or imagined?”

If your fear is imagined, then you’ve just identified a real growth opportunity. 

If your fear is based on something rational, then it’s time to hit the red light and ponder your decision a bit longer.


Photo: © Walenga Stanislav, YFS Magazine
Photo: © Walenga Stanislav, YFS Magazine

There’s huge value in not pulling the trigger so fast. Fear can help you contemplate a loose plan that needs more planning or avoid a huge costly mistake. 

Becoming BFFs with your fear can help you overcome setbacks quicker.

So here’s how to become BFFs with fear:


1. Respect, please… You’re a trailblazer

If what you are doing is easy everyone would be doing it. 
Develop your courage muscle and step into leadership in a bigger way.


2. Fear can be what you feel, not what you do

Separate your emotion from your behavior. 
You can feel scared, but you don’t have to act scared. You can feel unprepared for an investment pitch or you can get prepared. There’s a difference.


3. Fear can make you do stupid things

Treat fear like you would a drunk friend and love it with compassion. You know there’s value in the friendship, but sometimes you’ve got to put it to bed. Wisdom will prevail when you treat your fear with kindness.


4. If you’re dealing with irrational fear, do the opposite

Fear will make you want to be cautious. It will make you want to play small, hide or stay quiet. In this case you’ll want to say “thanks for the heads up” and do the opposite. Expand, show up more and speak your truth.


5. Fear is a servant, not a master

Fear provides us humans with some very unique physical sensations. It almost slows down time, makes your heart beat faster, shortens your breath and sometimes give you tunnel vision. But it can also serve your best interests.

Fear can:


  • be an incredible tool to practice self-awareness

  • help you develop a deeper sense of compassion for yourself

  • be your greatest business asset and has the power to catapult you and step into leadership in a bigger way

  • help you recognize that your emotions are not your behaviors



When you learn to embrace fear, you’ll develop a resiliency that will help you make solid business decisions. Embrace your fear, listen to it and make it work for you.


This article has been edited and condensed.

Shelley Davidescu is a business mentor for women in wellness who are ready to master, manifest, and magnetize their dream business. With a background in mental health, Shelley combines her knowledge in business, psychology and health in a powerful and magnetic way. Shelley teaches how to powerfully use your unique message and the soft touch coaching skills that every health coach must know in order to create healthy consistent income and bigger impact in the world today. Connect with @cleanforks on Twitter.


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